I once had a gentleman comment to me that most guys won’t go to bed with just anyone, if he wants to discuss sex right away is because he desires you and that should be a compliment to women. What is wrong with this statement? Maybe the fact that desiring doesn’t translate to wanting a relationship, just wanting sex and if he enjoys it maybe just maybe he will stick around for more. I would normally address the following to the ladies but I have to also include the men, because believe it or not there are many true gentlemen who don’t want to be used just for sex and wish to have an authentic relationship. So guys and gals don’t buy into the six pack and the hot looks, if that’s all a person is selling it’s because that’s all they have to offer and nothing more.
Discussing sex in a relationship is natural and healthy when the time is right and appropriate….. If you need to be reminded of the golden rule: “NO SEX before monogamy”. Having all discussions lead into sexual connotations is a clear indication of a person’s intention. Banking on the idea that they will in time develop true emotions for you and lead into a monogamous relationship is a big gamble that can result in disappointment and heartache. Remember only allow what you are willing to accept. Stick to your moral virtue and don’t compromise for no one, the last thing you want is to give in by emotional default and wake to have regrets. By human nature men are hunters and once they catch their prey and have feasted, they will move on to the next project; unless you allow time for emotional investment, then it becomes a wanted desired relationship.
The following are some clear indications that he may just not be ready for nothing more than a roll in the hay:
- You haven’t had a first date and they are sending and/or requesting provocative pictures.
- Shows no interest in wanting to find out about you and is too busy selling himself and his gadgets.
- His swagger is too pristine. A player knows how to go in for the kill without flaw and it starts with the direct eye contact. A guy, who is interested in you, for more than just the sex, will be slightly off key and nervously fumble his words.
- Refuses or avoids discussing personal matters or serious topics.
- He turns into an octopus on the first date. No cares for the impression he is leaving with you, why would he, he just wants to hit it and quit it!
- No phone call after sex on a first date. Don’t kid yourself to believe he is just being shy or playing hard to get. Just means he is done and got what he needed.
So buyer beware, take a good look at what is being sold to you!
Just Keeping it Real!
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