Dating Standards: First Date Deal Breakers #8- Walking in Confidence

This article is very essential, if not the most important point in finding your perfect match and succeeding in life in general. That pearl of wisdom is no other than your “Self-Confidence”. It’s that assurance in which you walk-in that will always lead you to the path of success, not to be confused with cockiness or arrogance.  If you ask any woman or man, what is the most attractive feature of a potential mate, the majority will always state “their self-confidence”.  Sounds great, but what exactly does that mean?

Confident Man:

Walks in the assurance of his decisions and isn’t afraid to admit that he doesn’t know everything.  A confident man is not in need of constant validation and is not threatened by others success. His faith in his abilities is demonstrated through his coolness and well maintained balance when under pressure. When he is wrong he is willing to accept responsibility and not prideful to request forgiveness, he accepts and welcomes constructive criticism and gives advice through love and diplomacy. A confident man has consideration for others and shows his love through his actions. He is able to express he cares for others and that he wants to be cared for.  A confident man does not worry about proving his masculinity to others; he is willing to reveal vulnerability and his romantic side in the name of love.

Confident Woman:

A confident woman is comfortable in her own skin and is not trying to be someone she is not. She is able to make sound rationale decisions that are selfish less.  She takes ownership of her natural beauty and is not held bondage by her need to fit in. A confident woman knows herself worth and sets the standard for how she will be cherished and appreciated by others. She knows her strengths and is willing to accept she is a work in progress. A confident woman walks into a room and people take notice, she always dresses the part with class and appropriateness.  A confident woman wants the most out of life and pushes herself to be the best she can be.  She can transition from being an outgoing adventurist to a loving gentle woman who always puts family first. A confident woman always speaks words of encouragement and knows how to control her emotions.  A confident woman is faithful and able to love unconditionally.

When defining your characteristics in a potential mate you never list someone with low self esteem.  Confidence, on the other hand, is usually at the top of everyone’s list.  Confidence makes a person more balanced and able to manage life’s challenging situations. Nobody wants to venture into a relationship with someone who is needy and lacking confidence out of fear, it enables the ability to believe in yourself and your capabilities for building healthy relationships.

So if you feel you are lacking confidence, I suggest you read a few self-help books, get a make-over or just fake it till you make it; but keeping it real, of course!

Just don’t do the following:

1. Never complain about your body or clothing; such as “I feel fat” or “I look like a mess”.
2. Never compare yourself to someone else or fish for a complement.
3. Stop fidgeting with your clothes, hair and make-up. If you need to freshen up, take a quick trip to the ladies room.
4. Don’t self declare your hotness!
5. Don’t name drop all the designers that are hanging on you.
6. DO NOT show off the list of suitors who want to date you. BIG TURN-OFF!
7. Never get caught with nothing to say.
8. And NEVER, NEVER, NEVER ask your suitor to rate your date at the end of the evening. Just finish off by stating: “I had a wonderful evening, as I hope you did as well, and I look forward to seeing you soon”.

So get your confidence on and start believing in possibilities. Remember confidence has nothing to do with your looks but everything to do with your attitude.  

Just keeping it real!